buh-bye summer

Could we really be down to the last weeks of summer already? My kids didn't even get out of school until the end of June, so the idea of starting up again in two weeks seems like time went oh too fast.

It's been a different kind of summer, the first I've ever spent without my boys. We talk regularly and they are having a great time back in Idaho with their dad--fishing, floating the river, going to all our old favorite places. J, half his teeth now missing, held up his wrist for me yesterday on the camera phone and proudly showed off the strand of yellow wrapping paper ribbon tied around it, signifying he had been certified to swim in the "big kid" pool at the YMCA. Z got glasses. E's voice is as deep as his brother's now. L seems to have grown braver, older in his mannerisms. I miss them dearly.

Trying not to spend the time alone feeling helpless, I had lists of things planned to keep Mr. Perfect and I occupied over the summer--a list of house to-do's and a list of fun things. Thus far there has only been one thing crossed off each. Sigh. It's not as if we haven't been busy though.

We marched in the big Huntington Beach 4th of July--or skateboarded, rather, with the OC Ramps float. That's my husband, the big furry guy. I was on my long board. It was an unforgettable introduction to the city's most celebrated holiday.

We spent several beach days, some I did on my own since Mr. Perfect had a lot of long hours to work in July. Some with the girls. The beach here is really crowded in the summer--tourists love it. But the warm water is worth the trade for the crowd. I noticed, too, that there seems to be a sound universal in every language for the moment your feet touch the ocean for the first time.

Mr. Perfect's band has played some great shows. It's his hobby, no money to be made, but it's a great one and they always put on the most entertaining performances--all heart. Lots of snacks and hours passed in strangely-scented green rooms waiting for the show to begin. I get to sell t-shirts and dance by myself in the back, which is way more awesome than it sounds :)

I managed to pull off a successful surprise party for Mr. Perfect's birthday. Surprise mostly because it was nearly a week before his birthday. His family and friends have taken me right in and I feel a loved part of the gaggle. Grateful they all turned out at my request to make the occasion a special one.

We got to take the girls on a private tour of the Jim Henson (Muppet) studio, which used to be Charlie Chaplin's studio and was a gorgeous, turn-of-the-century gem in the middle of L.A.. The girls got to try out puppets on the green screen and we all got a sneak peek of projects in the works. Plus I saw all the memorabilia from "Labyrinth." A dream come true I didn't even know I had!

There have also been a lot of simple days just spent enjoying the perpetual round of nearly perfect 75-80 degree temperatures, always with a tingle of sea breeze any time it starts to feel too hot. There really is a reason people will pay through their nose to live here. I try to get out and walk as much as I can, even though not many but the hobos do that here. But I've been able to discover some tucked away treasures, like this--one of the first homes in the city, now hidden behind a daycare and a bank:

The highlight of the summer was definitely the week I spent at the Tin House Writers Workshop in Portland, Oregon. It is touted as one of the finest workshops in the country, attracting 675 submissions this year alone, of which 250 were accepted--mine being one of them--with me being able to go only because of the faith of family, friends, and readers who helped cover my tuition. One long time blog reader picking me up at the airport, allowing me to stay the night at her home, and driving me to the workshop the next day. Two other readers taking me back to the airport at the end of the week. Several others offering both of these services as well.

After blogging for over five years, these people feel like close friends to me. I am so glad the feelings were mutual, that they truly did feel like old friends. Grateful that none of them were actually axe murderers.

Thank you, again, to all who helped in any way--big or small. I'm all slobbery and teary inside just thinking of what it means to have the support of so many as I chase this dream of mine--to share the world as I understand it, as I've experienced it, in a fictional way, in a way that only I can, in a way that I hope will bring a little spark of hope to the world of literary short fiction.

The workshop was held on the campus of Reed College, dating back to 1912. All old Oak trees and red brick, surrounded by a forest and lake that I ran around faithfully every morning. In the company of only other writers, with workshops, lectures, and readings from 9 am-9 pm, plus amazing gourmet food options in the cafeteria every day, life quickly became an alternate reality where nothing but writing and reading existed.

There were all kinds of successful, Pulitzer Prize-nominated writers, and talented upcoming writers and MFA graduates, (and fire dancers!) all with great advice. I think the one I took most to heart was what Cheryl Strayed (author of Wild) told me: "Writing is hard. But you know what else is hard? Coal mining. Only the coal miners don't stand around talking about how hard it is to mine coal, they just start digging."

Mr. Perfect had a little decorative bottle of coal pebbles from the time he lived in West Virginia. Painted on the outside are the words, "We Mine Coal." I put it up on my desk and have started digging, or writing, regularly and voraciously since. I'm determined to protect a short amount of time for writing daily, even after my boys come back. But also trying to protect time for exercise and time for scripture study and all the other little things we are counseled to 'protect time' for may upset my good intentions, but I hope to push on. It's all worth it and it will all get done. I'm not interested in publishing quickly, but publishing my best work. I trust myself. And I know what I am writing is improving all the time (sloppy blog style excluded :) )

So, for the next two weeks of summer, I'm focused on trying to check a few more things off those lists...and also enjoy the time I'm not checking off. I love life--bumps and all. I love my husband with all my heart. I love mothering. I love letting myself settle in to this new place at my own pace. I love ice cream. Heck, I even love you.