What is left lingering in my brain, though, are some strange questions that I suddenly feel the need to ask all of you .....
1. The eyeball dilemma..... When you talk to a person and are looking them directly in the eyes, do you attempt to look at both eyes at once, or do you look from eyeball to eyeball? If I try and look someone directly in two eyes---I start to giggle. Yup. Always fun to start cracking up in intense situations requiring a lot of eye contact....I have to look from eye to eye.
2. Shoes and socks.....when you put them on, do you go sock, sock, shoe, shoe; or sock, shoe, sock, shoe? I like to mix it up, becuase I'm just wild and crazy like that.
3. This last one involves a funny memory from my childhood that I wonder if anyone else shares. Since my mom was a widow, she was always "schooling" my brother and I in what to do should anything happen to her. Real macabre stuff too, like--before charging a car battery, she would hand us the wooden-handled broom and tell us that if it looked like she was getting electrocuted, we should use the broom to knock her away from the battery! Oh my goodness, I am almost in tears laughing so hard as I type this since it was just one of many "worst case scenarios" she would come up with!
The one I'm wondering if anyone else shares is her "what to do if I get hurt and am unconscious" scenario. Mom didn't tell us to go get a neighbor or dial the operator (pre 911 days y'all), NOOOOO...she told us that if something bad happened to her--my brother and I should DRIVE HER TO THE HOSPITAL!!! I was about 10 and my brother was 8. We had our system all worked out and discussed how cool it would be: he would push the gas pedal and I would steer. I'm surprised we didn't poison our mother or something, just to get an opportunity to drive the car!!!
SO, I guess that final question (I type through my tears of laughter) would be: were any of you ever told as a child a certain situation under which it would be ok to drive the car?
Give me some answers girlies, 1-2-3 :) !!!
31 comments:
The eye dilema is a tricky one - especially when I get tired, if I try to look at someone (or something) for too long I go cross-eyed. I think I definitely flick from one eye to the other. Although, one work colleague has a slightly turned eye, and I am always confused as to which one I should be looking at.
Definitely sock sock, then shoe shoe.
I don't think that there was ever an occasion I was told to drive the car!
Like your mother though, I do go for the macabre senarios. Mine are in the form of always stopping to check over the railing of a bridge we walk over to see if there are any dead bodies underneath.
I am trying desperately not to laugh out loud as not to wake my sleeping child, but your post cracked me up!!!
I am routine oriented so I go sock sock shoe shoe. Everytime! Not all of us are as crazy as you.
The eye thing...I have never thought too much about it, but I do know that in my family it is considered rude rude rude to not look someone directly in both eyes when you toast them or shake hands with them. Thats the.
And last...I am cracking up at the last part. I am just picturing you standing on guard with a broom ready to perform. We never were given instructions on when it was ok to drive, however, my grandma always locked the seatbelt strap through her purse handle so it stayed secured. This made for easy access to her insurance and identification in case of an accident that rendered her unconscious.
Thanks for the little chuckle
I am routine oriented so I go sock sock shoe shoe. Everytime! Not all of us are as crazy as you.
The eye thing...I have never thought too much about it, but I do know that in my family it is considered rude rude rude to not look someone directly in both eyes when you toast them or shake hands with them. Thats the.
And last...I am cracking up at the last part. I am just picturing you standing on guard with a broom ready to perform. We never were given instructions on when it was ok to drive, however, my grandma always locked the seatbelt strap through her purse handle so it stayed secured. This made for easy access to her insurance and identification in case of an accident that rendered her unconscious.
Thanks for the little chuckle
I started regularly driving at 12 down to the corner market to get whatever my mom wanted (I was always a horrible influence - doesn't a Hershey's bar sound deeelicious?!)! Fortunately for her, I looked older...
Eyeball to eyeball.
It depends on if I want just socks on for awhile. I believe I mix it up!
you are SO funnny, but my brain has turned to mush, so anything witty would be futile. :)
You are so funny! Weren't you able to get your driver's license at 14? I remember thinking that you were so lucky!!
The eye thing - must run in the family because this is something that I think about too! I usually look in the general direction of the eyes without staring right into them.
Sock, sock, shoe, shoe - unless...I am putting them on Jenna, then it's sock, shoe, sock, shoe. lol!
Can't think of a time when my parents told me to drive the car, but wow - I love the story of your mom!
Much love!
Karah
i'm bad, unless it's fam, i look at people's mouths!!
both socks first (after i've lotioned up) and then shoes.
i have a feeling i would have really liked your mom. :)
please go to my bloggie and follow the link to vote on my photos for the fair. :)
1) I tend to focus on their left eye.
2) Socks 1st, then shoes.
3) Not that I recall, but I had sisters significantly older than I am, so they were "on hand" to drive.
My dad always told stories of how he drove a potato truck in the spud harvests in Idaho when he was 8 though (just held it straight -- someone else would turn it around at the end of the row), and he never seemed to think driving at any age was a big deal as a result.
1. I look eye to eye too, but feel like MY eyes must look shifty when I do that.
2. Socks, then shoes. It seems really wrong to have a fully socked and shoed foot and a free one, even if momentarily. Preferably, though, no socks are needed at all.
3. That's really funny...but nope.
Eye to Eye. Seems to be my thing, I can't focus on both eyes at once!
Depends on my mood. Sometimes it's sock sock shoe shoe, others it's sock shoe sock shoe(for some reason I wanted to type shew instead of shoe, ugh today is not starting off great!).
I was the oldest of 3 and started driving things when I was about 10. Started off with the lawn mower, then the tractor, and then the truck to pick up bales. I love your story though, the broom is priceless!
You go, girlfriend (imagine me "z" snapping at this point)!!
I am not a girlie, but I can do a spot-on gay man impression.
Never thought about the eye to eye or both at once, this does crack me up. Socks first then shoes, because i put shoes on last before heading out the door.
No personal story about driving, but I had a boss who builds his own houses from the ground up (ENTIRELY and that is talent). SO he is on location to test the electricity for hte latest house. He has his kids in tow and tells the oldest (nine at the time), "If daddy gets zapped and falls down, call mommy on the cell phone by hitting hte green picture of the phone. Tell her daddy needs help." Nothing happened, but dang that would be scary.
Thanks for the giggles this morning, Curl Girl. And the Tracy Chapman was very nice, one of my favorites along with Give Me One Reason.
1. eyeball to eyeball.... I also vary at looking around different parts of the eyes (ie. eyelashes, eyebrows etc.
)
2. sock, sock, shoe, shoe... it's the obsessive compulsiveness coming out in me. It would feel weird to do it the other way.
3. Lets see... driving. My parents always encouraged us to learn how to drive... just "in case". I distinctly remember being 12 years old when my Dad promptly informed me I needed to learn to drive. I was terrified, but needless to say was quite comfortable driving at 13. Mind you we lived in a bigger city and so we were only allowed to drive the back roads in neighborhoods. It was definitely cool.
You so funny! I have a feeling you and I could be good friends!
Eyeball to eyeball, mouth, then back to eyeballs.
Sock-shoe dilemma, I like to mix it up too. I have a bad habit of refusing to create any kind of routine.
I grew up in Argentina, so the driving laws were a bit different. You had to be 18 to drive and 18 to drink (not together)
Nonetheless, my brother, who is 8yrs older than I, would let me drive his car when I was 10. And that was a stick, not automatic.
Your mom was trying hard to make sure you guys were prepared. I wouldn't even know where to start. But you made me laugh :)
1. I do eye ball to eye ball.
2. Sock and sock and then shoe and shoe.
3. My mom has been sick her whole life and I was a girl scout so, I have always been prepared for her death...it hasn't happened...yet.
1. I do side to side or right in the middle.
2. Both socks and the both shoes. Always.
3. My mom had all kinds of crazy scenarios like that, too, but none of them involved us driving. Probably because she had a Corvette and she loved that car more than her life. God forbid something were to happen to it.
1. I didn't know it was possible to look someone in both eyes at once. I don't think I've ever tried. I'm a hop from eye-to-eye girl, for sure!
2. sock, sock, shoe, shoe, most of the time, but I think I do mix-it-up occasionally. That said, I never do shoe, sock, shoe, sock. Never.
3. I was NEVER and would have NEVER BEEN given a situation where I was allowed to drive the car. I think my parents would've preferred death, actually. But I was never given the opportunity to find out, gratefully.
Ok, I'm sorry, but I'm gonna be rude and shirk your very cute questions. I have a question for you- Will you please give us an update on HCMM?
I second Amandas request!
You crack me up.
#1 I've thought about the eyeball thing too and noticed that I tend to shift my focus from eye to eye to mouth, then I get uncomfortable with so much eye contact so I look down a bit as if deep in "listening and considering" mode (a slight nodding of the head usually accompanies this), then I feel guilty for the lack of eye contact and move back up to their face so they know I'm still listening. But, I wonder, how WELL could I be listening if I've had time to think about all of this?
#2 sock sock shoe shoe. Because it's just wrong to have one foot all the way dressed and the other still naked.
#3 I was never given explicit instructions about driving the car in case of an emergency, but as the oldest, a girl, and an anxious, super-responsible one at that, I prepared myself to be ready, from a very young age, to quickly(!) climb from the back seat to the front and take control should my dad/mom/grandma/grandpa suddenly collapse. I even dreamed about it, so I KNEW I could do it!
Not driving but, we grew up in Northern Ireland and I remember my folks once went to a New Year party. As they were leaving we were told that if 'anything happened' we should grab a blanket from the hotpress and go and hide out in the hedge along the road and not move until they came and got us. Am I scarred for life?! mgmhhmgmmhhg. Your story is funnier - but it smacks of ME! I do that kind of thing all the time, and prolly with good reason as there have been a few times when.. well let's just say it might've involved a ladder, a drill and an electric cable in the wall. My husband doesn't like it when he comes home and sees that I've been in the toolshed. :D
1. I rarely look people in the eye when talking...it's like the quote "...where the introverts stare at their shoes and the extroverts stare at your shoes"...I'm awkward (as I'm sure you already noticed) :)
2. Sock, sock, shoe, shoe.
3. I have always been the weird one in my family who thinks of the worst case scenarios and what to do in those situations. In the little town I grew up in there was a one lane wooden bridge that we had to drive across quite often, and it was fairly long...so if we got to the middle and someone else was coming then one of us would have to back up and start over again...I bawled whenever that happened...I just knew that the Jackson Bridge would be the death of me.
1. I tend to look in the person's right eye (my left). I read somewhere that most people do that,and therefore to look in the opposite eye for a very long period of time is disconcerting to them. I do that, too. ; )
2. sock, sock, shoe, shoe. although I have been known to get wild and crazy and mix it up a bit.
3. under NO circumstances.
I'm a first time visitor. I'll be coming back!
I have missed reading your fun posts.
Okay, the eye thing is funny because it is something I have thought about but not consider other people thinking about. I shift, eye, eye, mouth, over the shoulder. Like someone else said, I probably look shifty!
Sock, Sock, shoe, shoe. Also probably because I don't wear shoes in the house.
I was never allowed to drive for any reason, or told I could under any circumstances--and I still don't like driving. But I was the 6th child of 8 children so the need never would have arisen.
However, I have said things to my kids about what to do if I get hurt. . . nothing like the broom thing, though I have thought it. Just things like "call 911 if--" These are good things to know!
I look at both eyes and mix it up with a little nose/pore glancing. I like to determine if a person has small pores or large. I'll check out yours soon:)
Sock, sock, shoe, shoe. I'm extremely regimented in that area.
Under no circumstances was I ever allowed to drive a car until I was 16. This was never an option. I didn't even know what a clutch was when I took driver's ed.
sock sock, shoe shoe, but most often it is no socks, shoe shoe. I am not a big fan of socks unless I am exercising or it is cold.
You got me with the eyeball thing.
It was okay for me to drive when I got my license and my own car :)
Was NEVER schooled on driving in case of emergency.....ever. :)
I try to avoid socks at all costs, but when I do wear them, I put both socks on first and then do the shoes.
I look from eyeball to eyeball. Rarely in both eyes. Except during temple recommend interviews at which point I try the whole time not to laugh. In fact, a contractor came to my house the other day and he kept switching is prominent eye so it was throwing me all off looking him in one eye ball or the other. :)
I so don't know you or your dearly loved mother, but I was near to tears laughing as I read about her "worst-case scenario" instructions. My Dad is the total opposite. He is someone with too little fear of death, and a doctor, so he's seen it all, and he continually tells us to just step away and let him go should any frightening situation arise. Imagine how morbid that sounded to my sisters and I when we were young?!? He has also told us, "When I do go, just cremate me and put me in a dixie cup on your mantle." What?!?!? God love him, but he's a goof!
Side note- I'm new to the blogging world, but I enjoy your writing. Thanks for sharing.
Okay I can finally type...ROFL!!!
Im definately a sock, sock, shoe, shoe person and because of me...my son is too!!!
I was laughing SO HARD when you were talking about your mom and all the advice...My dad did the same thing to me because well, he knew he was going to die of cancer at some point and just thought I should know certain things...(Im glad he did it now of course!)
And I am SO GUILTY of talking to my son about the "What to do in case im unconscious"...LOL
Im fact for a whole week when he was four...I tested him on 911 and go get the neighbor thing....LOL
Great post...
Don't know about the eye thing, but I certainly do sock, sock, shoe, shoe when I am wearing socks. I love summer when it is just shoe, shoe (usually flip, flop.)
My parents prepared us for all sorts of random things. When I was getting ready to take a car to college, my dad would randomly tell me to go out and change the tire, and would tell me which one to do. He would come behind me and check that I did it right. This was just when cellphones were first coming out, and he did not want me stranded on the road with a flat tire and no way to fix it myself.
My parents also made all us kids learn stick shift in case of an emergency as well. My brothers both cook and sew as well. My parents believed we should be prepared.
Man I've been away for so long! I'm an eyeball hopper, sock sock,shoe shoe putter onner, and I drove tractors and trucks from the time I could walk practically. So many under age driving stories I've got. Hilarious stuff. And knowing the antics of you and your brother, I too am surprised you didn't poison you poor mom! LOL!
Post a Comment