He's 12 now. 12. TWELVE! Meaning he's in middle school. Further meaning...I get an awful lot of begging for a Facebook account, and a cell phone, and various wheeled things. I also find interesting searches in my Google history such as "How to get a girl to like you in the 6th Grade". But the real crown jewel of life with a middle schooler is.....I get to drive him to school every morning and risk my life in the half-circle drop off of death.
Does your kids school have one of these?
The elementary school has one, but there are a lot of crossing guards and teachers and such that keep that one nice and orderly. In middle school, the orange vested friendly helpers disappear, and it's every driver for themself.
And it. is. scary.
First of all, I'm really only half awake at 7:11 am when I roll out of bed, throw on my $12 Wal Mart Uggs-wannabes and stumble to my ultra cool mini-van. About 7 minutes later, I think I finally open my eyes and realize that "Hey! Look at me! I'm driving here!" That's a good thing too, because I need all my faculties to make that left turn into the school and GET IN THE LINE.
The line is very important. The line is everything.
The line is usually very long and takes at least 5 minutes to make your way through and get your kid somewhere near the front door. Most people are good and get in the line, and better yet--they keep the line moving. They understand that you're supposed to kiss your kid, throw them out the door, and keep going. If just one car stalls while the child fishes out an instrument or homework or whatever, the line falls apart. That's when the creepers come in. I call them....
"The Inner Line People". (dramatic dum, dum, dum, dum)
The Inner Line People come up from the back of the line and begin to form a second, inner line which then prevents the original line people from being able to get out and causes a nasty half-circle traffic jam. And there is honking. And there is screaming out windows at one another. And there are gestures made.
The school sent a letter out that said something to the effect of "Get in the Line. Make sure your kids exit on the sidewalk because the parking lot is slick. And please don't kill eachother. Thank you very much (also don't forget about the bake sale)."
So this morning, the line was moving along very well. Kids were leaping out of the backseats like graceful gazelles and the cars just kept sliding along. It was like a beautiful automobile ballet. I guess it still wasn't fast enough for impatient dad in the Land Rover though....the one who zooms up and starts forming the inner line. His daughter gets out...in the parking lot....like the letter said not to....and falls right on her hiney....because it was slick....like the letter said it was. Then, while the daughter is getting up (and yelling at her dad), the original line people move out and cut him off, and I'm sure a few of them flipped him off as well. If he had been a zebra, the lions would have devoured his carcass. Don't mess with the line buddy.
It's a blog fodder adventure every morning, I tell ya.
Get in the line. Wait your turn. That's beautiful life advice right there, isn't it ladies :)?
Tell me if you've had any adventures dropping off or picking up your kids from school.
20 comments:
That is hilarious! Connor's school has a similar set-up, so I drop him off on the back side of the school and he has to hike through a field :)
Once upon a time I picked up one of my friend's daughter's afterschool. I literally remember my palms sweating some days.
I could make NO sense of parking lot rules...after all, I wasn't even THE parent. So it was me against the world. I'm sure I was more of a jackrabbit than a zebra though....
I just keep thinking about Mr Mom..."South to drop off Moron!" : )
It sounds like drop off is every man for themselves. Good luck!
Our carpool plan is pretty organized, but there are always those parents that are just above doing in the way they are supposed to. We have no buses, so our school is entirely pickup/dropoff so it takes a village. But some parents don't want to move through the line. It might take too long. So they park on the side of the highway and walk up to the school. And then the block our nicely moving traffic when the try to get out. The city has posted no parking signs, but unless they post one every four feet, some parents are still gonna do it. It's annoying. We have traffic monitors out there and a crosswalk person, but it still gets a little crazy if someone doesn't know the rules.
There are two kinds of parents, I believe. One kind are the people who read the rules and then adjust their routines accordingly. The other kind thinks "well, that just won't work for me" and does whatever he pleases. No matter that it endangers their own child or others. I don't get that kind of thinking. Yes, I know our line might be inconvenient, but they chose to send their kid to our school, and knew it was like this, so I feel like they should cooperate.
Can you tell I don't like my carpool duty? LOL.
my son's local elementary school is right across the street from the Junior High. Oh my. I think I'll be letting my kids take the bus by then (Unless they get jumped on the bus or something!) That crazy line backs up so much, it ends up affecting the elementary school line. Not pretty!
It's not a mirage. I'm really here. Don't pass out from the surprise!
I hear ya. Loud and clear.
Fortunately, I live literally a stone's throw from our school; 3 doors down, to be exact.
Unfortunately, Meeka can't go to that school. Not this year. Her birthday was just a few days late, and our school has A VERY LONG waiting list of students whose parents want their child to have an overly accelerated education. You know... school snobs. I must admit that I used to fall into that category, hence my home choice... but my thoughts have changed.
But back to the subject at hand:
So Meeka goes to a school in another district, 5 miles away. She is in kindergarten and the school has a policy of not dropping kindergarteners off at the curb, so we park and walk into school every day. Not a problem, because there are two entrances into the parking lot. One for the parents who park, and one for the parents who follow the car line.
Not a problem until they closed the parking lot.
Yes. The school REQUIRES that you walk your child in, but REFUSES to allow you to park in the lot! And it is on busy streets with no-parking signs everywhere. So, we now have to go through the car line, leave our car in the fire lane for 5 minutes and return.
It used to take me 15 minutes round trip to drive there, walk her in, and drive home. It now takes 40-50 minutes. It is so dum there is no b to be found.
Myself and other parents have gone into the office to complain and were told what? That if they open the parking lot, all of the spaces get full.
Um... that's the point of the lot, is it not?
So, we wind our way around the empty parking lot in the car line every day.
Urgh.
my middle schoolers usually rides the big yellow taxi. but the other morning i took her. on realizing i forgot my gloves i borrowed hers in the car. after i dropped her off i realized i still had the gloves on. i flagged down another 5th grader by rolling down my window (so glad when i realized she knew my daughter) and asked her to drop them off to my daughter's classroom. she was kind not to laugh at my jacket over my nightgown, glasses, messy hair, and green puffs emitting from my mouth from my mossy teeth.
LOL! It's just as bad here for the kindergartners. Makes me crazy. Nampa was SO organized and I expected it to be that way here...not so. And then we have the moms that roll down their windows and chat and chat and chat, without a thought in the world about the idea of a "moving line." Argghhh..
Thank goodness I rarely have to take any of my kids to school. Picking up is bad enough...
That's why my daughter rides the bus:-)
That was so funny...it made me laugh out loud, especially the part where it's so early and you just realize you're driving-that sounds just like me. I am not a morning person by any stretch of the imagination. My son is only 19 months-old, so I have never experienced school drop off in this way, but I think that makes me appreciate the humor in it!
All I know is... your music makes me want to watch Bourne Identity today :)
I do not get the privilege of picking up or dropping off my kids at school, but "the line" occurs in it's natural form in many places. And the "inner line" people are every where also. I just don't understand how half of the world can not understand the "get in line and wait your turn" concept. Great post and your son is handsome and should not have any problem getting the girls to like him now or in the future.
And I look at pictures of kids (like your picture of your twelve year old) and wonder how on earth men can't WANT to spend time with their children. I am waling ten feet off the ground if I even get to HEAR their voices on the phone each day. Fluck and double fluck.
Looks like you hit a nerve with this one. Fortunately, I've never really had to go through this. I realized from this post I was being ungrateful for that.
If I didn't know we lived in different states, I would swear our kids went to the same school. We have the same set up, mile long line, line buckers who deserve the morning bird and my biggest pet peave, the don't move uppers. These are the people who are somewhere in la-la land, who won't pay attention (maybe their asleep), who won't keep equal distance from the car in front of them. Can't they see there's a routine here and you can planely see that you need to have minimal distance between each car? I finally honked at a don't move upper the other morning, and timed it wrong as a little cute girl walked past my car. I scared her to death with my big horn and probably made her think I was gesturing to her.Oh well, Luckily for me, as I get one child out of junior high, here comes the next. Good times!!!!!!!!
oh, my elementary parking is like a zoo, too...
off topic, but relating to the FB thing...do any of your kids have an email account? my six year old keeps asking for one, saying he wants to email grandma and grandpa...um, he is over grade level in reading and things and does online math and reading games...that often ask for a parent's email to log in. he wants to skip that step and be 100% independent. anyway...just wondering if any other moms let their little ones have emails or if i should keep on with the waiting.
I just started homeschooling my sweet little boy and I am so not missing the car line! He went to a private christian school, and it was amazing how EVIL people got in the car line! LOL! Love your blog!
Stacie
That was HILARIOUS! We have a line. I try to avoid it. But our line is still Elementary style where you get some order with vested traffic directors. I defied them once (because we were late and there was no longer a line anyway) and got a lecture. I have friends that call it the Conga line and get there 15-20 minutes early to get near the head at the end of the day. Nobody's died yet!
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