like the dog who catches the car...

Growing up, my dog Sydney, a feisty cockerpoo, used to chase cars. But not like one of those stupid dogs that goes after tires. She'd kind of just run along the sidewalk, barking as ferociously as a portly cockerpoo can. She always made me wonder, though, what a dog would do if it ever actually caught one of those cars it was chasing? Because, although they like to think they could, they probably don't ever expect to.

There. That's the extent of my attempts to think like a dog :)

***Right now...I'm totally feeling like a dog who caught a car. 

I applied to 5 MFA programs--3 in Poetry, 2 in Fiction-- hoping to get into one, but never really expecting to. After all, they're all intensely competitive, accepting 10% or less of candidates who apply (and it's a rigorous application process all around that only the best of the best really suffer through). 

But I've received acceptances to two programs.

TWO! One to the full-time program at CSU Long Beach, and one to the low-residency program at Pacific University.  The first would mean moving, the second would mean staying here while traveling to campus for ten days a semester. Both are three year programs.

In my mind, I'd hypothesized about what I'd do if accepted, how it would work to fit an additional 25 hours of schooling into my already jam-packed schedule, even priced housing in Southern California....but it all still felt like playing pretend. Chasing a car. Ruff. Ruff.

I received the acceptances mid-March and it's been hard not to spill the beans on the blog already, but I needed to do some deep soul searching and praying. I don't take commitments lightly and I pretty much have to be on my death bed to give up on something I said I'm going to do. I needed to consider what it would mean to my little family in terms of time and financial commitments. Plus, a move would be a huge deal, albeit one we're all willing to do.

And my decision? (drum roll....)

*I will be starting the MFA program in Fiction at Pacific University in June.*

It really is an amaaaaazing program. Ranked #4 in the nation. It attracts faculty from other programs that I would never get a chance to work with otherwise, including long-admired favorites of mine Benjamin Percy, Pam Houston, and poet, Marvin Bell.

I was most worried about taking on the loan debt that a non-funded, low-residency program entails, but after talking to some friends of mine who are in funded MFA programs but still having to take out loans to cover living expenses, I figure I'd end up in a similar amount of debt regardless. Plus, I get to stay here--working my beloved job(s), near friends, no major custody re-arranging AND I get to spend some of my summer near the Oregon coast, one of my favorite places on earth. Then, in three years, not only will I be qualified to teach at the university level, I'll also, hopefully, have produced at least one publication-ready piece.

It's a perfect fit, I think. Though it's a hard,hard thing to give up California...but I'll save that for a future post.


And you know what I'm going to do with this caught car? I'm going to go take it to my owner, drop it, wag my tail, and wait for it to be re-thrown. When I catch it again, I can guarantee it will be some other dream I never thought I'd grab on to...but did :)